Disciples of California

The mission is doing weird things to me.

For example, my companion and I discovered a common love for Pokémon this week. We have been drawing a picture of a Pokémon in our planners each day, and I expect this tradition to continue at least through the rest of this transfer. We have talked about our favorite Pokémon. We have talked about the horrible things we would do to be able to play Pokémon right now. AND, we worked together to make a list from memory of all 151 original Pokémon. We clearly have problems. This is the kind of thing that I have learned to do out here to remain sane, even though it probably just makes me sound crazy.

We did a division this week. I spent a day in a nearby city called Porto Ferreira with the district leader's companion. We ate lunch at a member kid's house because the irmã who was supposed to provide lunch had forgotten about it. We just showed up at the other kid's house and his mom (grandma, maybe?) made lunch for us on the spot. This was the second time I had been to that house because we did a division a few weeks ago. The lady who cooked lunch is like a cartoon character. She is permanently surrounded by a cloud of smoke because of the cigarette that is always stuck in her mouth. Like many Brazilian women, she doesn't talk; she yells. We greeted her with a handshake and she kissed our hands. I have never felt more uncomfortable. Even though she was a strange -- maybe "unique" is a better word -- lady, she was incredibly generous. She made us lunch and said that we were always welcome there.

While I was in Porto Ferreira, we taught a girl about the Restoration. Her member sister was there, which helped a lot. My temporary companion is Brazilian, so I couldn't speak a word of English for that whole day. I was surprised to find that I can survive here without it. My ability to communicate with people is nowhere near perfect, but I surprise myself sometimes when I see how far I've come since I left the Promised Land. The girls and my companion wanted me to offer the opening prayer to our lesson in English, so I did. It was so weird! I haven't prayed in English for months, so that was a strange experience.

Bruno, that guy who stopped us in the street a couple weeks ago and asked how he could become a Mormon, stopped us in the street again the other day. He thanked us multiple times but said he doesn't want anything more from us. He isn't willing to quit smoking or drinking. I guess it's just too much fun, huh? It's so hard to keep going after stuff like that happens, but there isn't really anything you can do.

We have been teaching a kid named Guilherme for a while now. His grandma and aunt came to church yesterday, and they liked it. We have to get the grandma to stop drinking coffee and the aunt to stop smoking, but I really think they could be baptized. It would be amazing to help all of them join the Church together so they could stay firm.

Guilherme's aunt brought her two kids with her to church. During sacrament meeting, I asked her if her six-year-old son would like to draw, and she said yes. I opened my planner to a blank page and offered it to the kid. I got my planner back at the end of the meeting, and it had scribbles all over the cover and on most of the pages inside! I think it looks better this way, actually.

We have interviews tomorrow, and if I don't get my Christmas package I'm going to explode the universe. BUT I am so grateful to have a Christmas package (in transit) and to have such a loving family! I love all of you so much! It took coming to this strange place and being away from you for a long time to realize how amazing you all are. Thank you for everything you guys have always done to help me grow, and everything you continue to do. I love you!

luv

booga

P.S. My favorite Pokémon is and always will be Blastoise. I know you were wondering. And I'm not a loser!

And when we break, we'll wait for our miracle

This week was pretty good for me. We're finally teaching some good investigators and we're starting to see some fruits from the work that we started doing last transfer.

I received a good stack of mail at district meeting on Tuesday. I received two packages, one from Jana, and one from the Parrys in our home ward. THANK YOU, Jana!! You said that the package wasn't that big of a deal or something, but receiving a bunch of delicious American candy and a nice letter of encouragement helps so much out here. I really can't thank you enough for doing that. The package I received from the Parrys was a huge box packed with Christmas candy. That was so thoughtful of them. I also received a nice Christmas card from the young women back home. I noticed that they sent it to the MTC, though. Is my address in the ward bulletin up to date? Just wondering. Oh, and Mom: tell them (and everyone in the world) that the official language of Brazil is Portuguese, not Spanish. That was a bit awkward.

Unfortunately, I didn't receive my Christmas package yet; however, I did get a nice letter from the Brazilian Department of Agriculture saying that I had to pay a fat tariff of R$ 97 (that's about fifty dollars) to receive my package. I should get it at interviews in two weeks. I heard that if you put pictures of Jesus on packages sent from the States, the Brazilian postal workers won't open it. So, I guess you could try that if any of you ever send me anything. People down here love pictures of Mary, doves, and the Crucifixion, so you could mix it up a little. Be creative.

We have been teaching an eleven-year-old kid named Guilherme for the past few weeks. He really likes going to the activities each Friday night. We had our district leader come by this last Friday to conduct a baptismal interview, and he passed. An hour or so later, Guilherme came to the activity at the church and told us he couldn't be baptized. His grandma, a nice old lady who thinks my companion and I have beautiful eyes (we get that a lot), doesn't think that he is ready to be baptized. It was discouraging to hear that, but we aren't giving up. She came with us to church yesterday and enjoyed it. She already knew some of the irmãs (sisters) in the branch, so they would be able to help her with any questions she might have. We are going to go back to their house this week and teach her so that she can be baptized at the same time as Guilherme. If things work out right, this could be huge. They only live two streets away from the church, they have friends who are members, and they could help one another out to stay firm in the Church. I really hope this one turns out right. I'm tired of disappointment.

We taught the Word of Wisdom to Bruno, and he said that he doesn't have the desire to stop smoking or drinking. Carnaval, a Brazilian holiday where everyone parties for a week straight, is going on right now. He basically told us that he wouldn't be at church this week because of Carnaval. So, we'll see what happens. Hopefully someone gives him some bad weed or something and he seeks out our help.

It has been difficult this week to keep myself motivated and to want to work. I appreciate the support that you guys always give me, and I am really grateful for the sustaining power of the Spirit. This work would be impossible without it. I am grateful to be here and for all the things I'm learning every day. The Church is true. I love you.

--elder vings (no one can pronounce my name)

They make me feel like I'm only what I see sometimes

The mission is having transfers today, but I'm not. We found out on Saturday that my companion and I are both staying in Leme, thank goodness. We didn't have any baptisms last transfer, although we came close a few times before our investigators tore our hearts out and spat in our faces, so I'm glad that I get to stay here to follow through with the work we have been doing for the last six weeks.

A twentysomething named Bruno stopped us on the street on Saturday and asked how he could become a Mormon. He appeared to be sober, so we took his address and went to his house the next day. We taught him the message of the Restoration. He paid close attention and seemed to understand the lesson pretty well. The Spirit was strong. We invited him to read 3 Nephi 11 and come to church with us the next day. We met up with him early in the morning yesterday, walking for miles to his house, and then many miles more to the chapel. We talked. He read 3 Nephi 11 and prayed about it. Still waiting on the answer.

Church was sort of a disaster. The Gospel Principles teacher never prepares a lesson, so he's been working from the first lesson in the class manual (it's about the existence of God) every week since I've been here. He treats our investigators like children. I mean, like stupid children. Like stupid baby monkeys, maybe. He singles them out one at a time and asks confusing questions. The first thing he taught yesterday was that there was a council in heaven before the earth was created, and that God was conversing with many other gods when he created man. So now our investigators probably think we're polytheistic like the Greeks. Anyway, Bruno didn't seem to notice that the class was a joke. I think he enjoyed it.

We had testimony meeting afterwards, and this one girl (lady? woman? she's thirty, but she still lives with her parents) started flirting with Bruno and sat down with him in the back of the chapel. This girl (lady? woman?) is nice enough, but she's kind of a snake. She was persistent in getting my companion's and my emails when we had lunch at her house a week or two ago (we gave her fake addresses), and apparently she flirts with all the missionaries who pass through Leme. We tried to save our investigator by offering to sit with him up front, but he and the girl (lady? woman?) politely refused. Bruno left right after sacrament meeting, alone. He said that he liked it though, so who knows.

We had another activity that no one went to or cared about. This branch needs an activities committee.

It has been so hot this week. It's hard to smile and talk to people when you walk for miles and miles every day under the blazing sun, but I still try to do it anyway.

I think I've sounded pretty frustrated in my emails lately, especially about the members. Don't misunderstand; I am incredibly grateful to be here on the mission, and in Leme. The members here are really kind, generous people. I learn a lot about sacrifice and diligence from them.

Jamie asked me what my diet is like. My companion and I have developed an addiction to off-brand Frosted Flakes (every other cereal is insanely expensive), so I eat those every morning. The real-life Frosted Flakes were on sale last week, so I bought and ate four boxes of them. I always have some kind of fruit in the house to munch on before we head out for the day. Apples and bananas are usually the only fruits that aren't insanely expensive (everything in Brazil is insanely expensive). We eat at members' houses for lunch. We have rice and beans every day, usually served with any number of the other Brazilian staples: chicken, beef, spaghetti, mashed potatoes, and potato salad. They always place a 2 liter bottle of guaraná (soda) on the table. We rarely have any kind of vegetable. For dinner, I just eat a snack before bed because we get home so late. I'm going to get fat and die.

I think that's plenty for this week. I love all of you very much. The gospel is true, and President Monson is a living prophet of God. The Church is the Church of Jesus Christ. All the other churches down here are false and scary.

wif luv,
booooooga

With scarves of red tied 'round their throats

We had zone conference this week. I didn't know exactly what to expect because it was the first time I had been to one, but I rather enjoyed it. There are two senior missionaries who serve as the doctors to all the missionaries in Brazil, and they both spoke to us. Their accents were terrible (confidence booster!), but they gave some good advice about how to stay healthy out here. It's too bad our diet is so horrifying.

After that we received training from the mission president, the assistants, and our zone leaders, all of which were pretty good. The assistants demonstrated how they want us to make street contacts, and one of them tried to mark a baptismal date during the contact. I think that's questionable at best, but whatever. They actually talked about how the numbers we aim for represent people, which was refreshing to hear.

I was tired by the time conference ended (didn't realize it would last foreight hours), but it was good to feel rejuvenated (oh my gosh I forgot how to spell). I was exercising a ton of faith that I would finally receive my Christmas package at conference, but no dice. I guess I'll have to wait until transfers next week, or more likely, at interviews sometime this or next month. I did get two nice little Christmas cards, though.

We taught a middle-aged woman this week named Cida. The lesson went pretty well except that she said things like "right," "uh huh," and "that's true" every three seconds, which usually means that they aren't listening. After we completed our message, I offered the closing prayer. While I was praying, Cida whispered quietly to herself so that we couldn't understand her. She did so in a nearly inaudible, hissing voice. This isn't uncommon in Brazil -- I've already encountered people who do this during prayers. But when my companion and I said "amen" and looked up, Cida was staring at us. I mean, she was basically STARING THROUGH OUR SOULS. I've never felt so creeped out. We exited the house and my companion said that she was probably trying to counteract the prayer or curse us or something. Weird.

**This is going to be gross.**
We also encountered a drunk man in the street a few days ago. He walked up to us and, like all drunk people, started telling us about God and his past sins and the endless troubles in his life. My companion tried his best to talk to him, but it was almost hopeless. The man wouldn't listen. But my companion continued, trying to explain a pamphlet we have so that we could leave it with him and get out of there. The man kept interrupting him, and as he was talking one time, a little white thing fell out of his mouth and landed on his bottom lip. Although he didn't seem to notice it, we did. The little white thing that he coughed up was a little white larva or maggot or something (oh gosh I'm going to throw up, I shouldn't have even brought this up). He later spit another one out. We finished the contact and left and I wanted to puke and die.
**That's all.**

I picked up an Ensign (in English!) from the church when we had district meeting this week. It's the conference issue from April 2008, when President Monson was sustained as the prophet. I have been reading a few talks every day, and it has been such a spiritually renewing experience. I find great comfort in reading the words of the prophet and apostles, and doing so helps me to think differently about the things that I study. I never realized before the mission the sacred importance of having living prophets and apostles to guide the Church today. I know that those men are called of God and that the lead the only true church on the earth. And I am not taking their words for granted anymore.

That's all for this week. The work is starting to pick up as the members are getting more excited and more involved. There are some things that they just don't seem to get, though. We went to a leadership meeting yesterday where someone suggested having family home evening on a day other than Monday. Everyone else seemed to think that it was a good idea, and no one brought up the fact that a prophet of the Lord designated Monday night as the night for family home evening. So ... we're having it on Wednesday this week. What.

elder boogalee bear