With scarves of red tied 'round their throats

We had zone conference this week. I didn't know exactly what to expect because it was the first time I had been to one, but I rather enjoyed it. There are two senior missionaries who serve as the doctors to all the missionaries in Brazil, and they both spoke to us. Their accents were terrible (confidence booster!), but they gave some good advice about how to stay healthy out here. It's too bad our diet is so horrifying.

After that we received training from the mission president, the assistants, and our zone leaders, all of which were pretty good. The assistants demonstrated how they want us to make street contacts, and one of them tried to mark a baptismal date during the contact. I think that's questionable at best, but whatever. They actually talked about how the numbers we aim for represent people, which was refreshing to hear.

I was tired by the time conference ended (didn't realize it would last foreight hours), but it was good to feel rejuvenated (oh my gosh I forgot how to spell). I was exercising a ton of faith that I would finally receive my Christmas package at conference, but no dice. I guess I'll have to wait until transfers next week, or more likely, at interviews sometime this or next month. I did get two nice little Christmas cards, though.

We taught a middle-aged woman this week named Cida. The lesson went pretty well except that she said things like "right," "uh huh," and "that's true" every three seconds, which usually means that they aren't listening. After we completed our message, I offered the closing prayer. While I was praying, Cida whispered quietly to herself so that we couldn't understand her. She did so in a nearly inaudible, hissing voice. This isn't uncommon in Brazil -- I've already encountered people who do this during prayers. But when my companion and I said "amen" and looked up, Cida was staring at us. I mean, she was basically STARING THROUGH OUR SOULS. I've never felt so creeped out. We exited the house and my companion said that she was probably trying to counteract the prayer or curse us or something. Weird.

**This is going to be gross.**
We also encountered a drunk man in the street a few days ago. He walked up to us and, like all drunk people, started telling us about God and his past sins and the endless troubles in his life. My companion tried his best to talk to him, but it was almost hopeless. The man wouldn't listen. But my companion continued, trying to explain a pamphlet we have so that we could leave it with him and get out of there. The man kept interrupting him, and as he was talking one time, a little white thing fell out of his mouth and landed on his bottom lip. Although he didn't seem to notice it, we did. The little white thing that he coughed up was a little white larva or maggot or something (oh gosh I'm going to throw up, I shouldn't have even brought this up). He later spit another one out. We finished the contact and left and I wanted to puke and die.
**That's all.**

I picked up an Ensign (in English!) from the church when we had district meeting this week. It's the conference issue from April 2008, when President Monson was sustained as the prophet. I have been reading a few talks every day, and it has been such a spiritually renewing experience. I find great comfort in reading the words of the prophet and apostles, and doing so helps me to think differently about the things that I study. I never realized before the mission the sacred importance of having living prophets and apostles to guide the Church today. I know that those men are called of God and that the lead the only true church on the earth. And I am not taking their words for granted anymore.

That's all for this week. The work is starting to pick up as the members are getting more excited and more involved. There are some things that they just don't seem to get, though. We went to a leadership meeting yesterday where someone suggested having family home evening on a day other than Monday. Everyone else seemed to think that it was a good idea, and no one brought up the fact that a prophet of the Lord designated Monday night as the night for family home evening. So ... we're having it on Wednesday this week. What.

elder boogalee bear