Between the click of the light and the start of the dream

August 23, 2010

Dear everyone,

I'm so sorry to hear about Lucy. My mind hasn't really processed the fact that she died yet; being away from home for so long kind of makes stuff like this seem even more surreal. It sounds like the nucleus folks back home (especially Sam) have really been mourning
her loss. My heart goes out to you guys. I wish there was something I could do to comfort you, but I only know how to think in terms of gospel doctrine now, and I don't know if the Plan of Salvation applies to animals. Too soon?

This week was pretty nuts, kind of. That guy who went to church last week, Manoel, was really the entire focus of our work for this week. It turns out that he's kind of a genius; that is, he knows a ton about the Bible and has seriously investigated five or six other churches before. He is also working on his doctorate degree in human genetics or something equally insane. Anyway, we have been teaching him every day since we met him, and things are going pretty well. He read all of 1 Nephi in one day, and then reread it the next day. And in spite of his biblical knowledge, he is really open to everything we're teaching him.

Our biggest challenge has been to help him start investigating the Church instead of just studying it. He seems really afraid to keep commitments and live the commandments and all that. Oh, and my companion invited him to allow us to prepare him to be baptized, and he sort of freaked out. He used to go to a church and then fell away because people were discriminative against him (he's black) and treated him poorly. And he says that he doesn't want to join another church only to fall away again, even if for other reasons.

He has a lot of baggage like that, you know? But he's easily one of the smartest people I have taught on my whole mission.

We didn't have much else going on this week because my companion got sick for a day and a half. We figured out that in 36 hours, his face was in his pillow for 24. He slept like a rock through Thursday, so we didn't get much else done. We're also having some minor problems with discouragement and low morale. Last night we had a sleepover with the other Americans in our zone, and we're having a barbecue today with everyone. I think stuff like this has been good for both of us. It really helps to get out of your area every once and a while and talk to new people, even if you get along well with your companion.

And my comp is having some complicated girl problems that would take too long to explain here. They aren't helping with the discouragement, though.

Anyway, concerning the work: I'm just trying to learn what the Lord wants me to learn from all this. This area has been so hard; we have worked like crazy and exhausted every idea we can think of to find new people who are ready to accept the gospel, and nothing has worked (yet). I'm not giving up or anything, but it would be nice to figure out what I'm supposed to figure out from what has (and hasn't) happened here in the last eleven weeks. I dunno.

Transfers are coming up next Monday, so who knows where the heck I'll be when I write you guys next week!

I hope you guys don't think I'm depressed or anything. I went through a reeeeeeeeeeally diffcult couple of weeks here, but I'm doing fine now. I'm happy. I'm learning the importance of applying gospel principles into what we do and who we are instead of just memorizing what they are.

Anyway. I was going to close this email with a powerful scripture, but I couldn't think of one that would be just right. Just remember that we become disciples of Christ when we love others (John 13:34-35, I think); in fact, we are supposed to love them as we love ourselves (John...15? I think?). That means we have to love ourselves before we love others! So do everything you can to do both!

I love all of you so much.

luv

booga